Scott Wolfe Ph.D.
Clinical Psychologist/ Certified Gottman Couples Therapist

Sound Relationship House: Gottman Theory

About Gottman Method Couples Therapy

What is Gottman Method Couples Therapy?  
Gottman Method Couples Therapy combines the knowledge and wisdom
of more than three decades of Gottman research and clinical practice. Through
research-based interventions and exercises, it helps couples break through
barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy in their
relationships. Gottman Method Couples Therapy is a structured, goal-oriented,
scientifically-based therapy. Intervention strategies are based upon empirical
data from Dr. Gottman’s three decades of research with more than 3,000 couples.
This research shows us what actually works to help couples achieve a long-term
healthy relationship. Gottman Method Couples Therapy was developed out of
this research to help couples:
  • Increase respect, affection, and closeness
  • Break through and resolve conflict when they feel stuck
  • Generate greater understanding between partners
  • Keep conflict discussions calm


                                                                                              Copyright- The Gottman Relationship Institute

      Research shows that to make a relationship last, couples must become better friends, learn to manage conflict, and create ways to support each other's hopes for the future.  Drs. John and Julie Gottman have shown how couples can accomplish this by paying attention to what they call the Sound Relationship House, or the seven components of healthy coupleships.

The Gottman Theory For Making Relationships Work

  • Build Love Maps: How well do you know your partner’s inner psychological world, his or her history, worries, stresses, joys, and hopes?
  • Share Fondness and Admiration: The antidote for contempt, this level focuses on the amount of affection and respect within a relationship. (To strengthen fondness and admiration, express appreciation and respect.)
  • Turn Towards: State your needs, be aware of bids for connection and turn towards them. The small moments of everyday life are actually the building blocks of relationship.
  • The Positive Perspective: The presence of a positive approach to problem-solving and the success of repair attempts.
  • Manage Conflict: We say “manage” conflict rather than “resolve” conflict, because relationship conflict is natural and has functional, positive aspects. Understand that there is a critical difference in handling perpetual problems and solvable problems.
  • Make Life Dreams Come True: Create an atmosphere that encourages each person to talk honestly about his or her hopes, values, convictions and aspirations.
  • Create Shared Meaning: Understand important visions, narratives, myths, and metaphors about your relationship.
       --Courtesy of the Gottman Relationship Institute

My Practice:
Located in Columbia, Maryland. Serving the following counties in Maryland: Howard County, Anne Arundel County, Baltimore County, Montgomrey County, Prince Georges County, Frederick County, and Carroll County. I also provide services for individuals and couples who live in the surrounding communities of Ellicott City, Elkridge, Eldersberg, Frederick, Laurel, Scaggsville, Burtonsville, Olney, Dayton, Catonsville, Halethorpe, Fulton, Highland, Savage, Russett, Crofton, Fort Meade, Jessup, West Friendship, Silver Spring, Arbutus, Linthicum, Pasadena, Glen Burnie, Baltimore, Owings Mills, Timonium, Towson, Beltsville, College Park, Severna Park, Calverton, Washington D.C., Alexandria, Arlington, Fairfax, Falls Church, Chantilly, Leesburg, McLean, Mount Vernon, Tysons Corner, and Annapolis.

The Gottman Institute Video

Dr. Gottman describes how the "masters" of relationships make repairing things after an argument a priority. But what makes some repair attempts succeed while others fail?